There is guilt, which is not of the Lord and then there is godly conviction. Like when God lays on your heart that you need to change in an area. He does this to me all the time. And this area of cell phone/computer use is definitely an area where I need to keep a check. I am running two businesses and of course love staying in touch with friends and family throughout the day so these things can consume all my time if I let them. It is a struggle to keep the Gibson girls and my man my priority.
About a year ago, a friend posted a link on facebook to a blog called Hands Free Mama. Boy, her motto is "Letting go...to grasp what really matters." It is such a good reminder to put my phone down and engage my children on a regular basis. They are what matters most. I do have to be careful reading her stuff, balancing Godly conviction with ungodly guilt, but I love her Hands Free Pledge. And over the past few months I have tried to practice this list. Just to be honest...I still have a long ways to go in accomplishing it.
I’m going Hands Free. I want to make memories, not to-do-lists. I want to feel the squeeze of my daughter's arms, not the pressure of over-commitment. I want to get lost in conversation with my spouse, not consumed by a sea of unimportant emails. I want to be overwhelmed by sunsets that give me hope, not by extracurricular commitments that steal my joy. I want the noise of my life to be a mixture of laughter and gratitude, not the intrusive buzz of cell phones and text messages. I am letting go of distraction, disconnection, and perfection to live a life that simply, so very simply, consists of what really matters. I’m going Hands Free. And if this sounds like a life you want to start living, come along.
I can't find the list on her site:( I will keep looking but here is the gist of it...
It involves not being on your phone when there are connection times with your kids that
are big. Like, on the way to school, when you pick them up in the afternoons, dinner time.
Seize those times to be with your kids and engage them.
I did find this:
For those who are new to this journey, I provide some clarification about living “Hands Free.”
Living “Hands Free” does not mean:
-Giving up your electronic devices/technology
-Giving up your work time, job responsibilities, and home duties
-Giving up “me” time or much needed adult alone time
-And it does not mean staring at your children 24 hours a day and never leaving their sides.
Living “Hands Free” means temporarily letting go of external or internal distraction (i.e.; phone, computer, unrealistic standards, perfection) to be fully present with someone or something meaningful in one’s life.
All day long, we have choices on how we spend our time. When you begin to develop a “Hands Free” mentality, you become mindful of these choices.
For example, you might find yourself asking:
Could this (phone call, work assignment, Facebook status update) be done later?
Could this (laundry folding, car washing, house cleaning, dinner preparation) be done as a family?
Sometimes the answer will be NO. That is life. As adults, sometimes we must do what we need to do.
But other times, you will find yourself saying, “Right now, I see an opportunity to connect with my child/loved one and that is the most important thing I must do right now.”
Whether you are able to let go of distraction for 10 minutes, two hours, or an entire day, meaningful connection can occur in that precious time.
And for the record, I have never regretted the choice to let of distraction and go “Hands Free.” In fact, I am always grateful I made the choice to connect to what really matters.
For me, here's what I've sought to do:
-Have my quiet time in the mornings before my kids are awake so that once they are up I
am more available for them.
-Not be on my phone while dropping off or picking the girls up from school
-Watch more Dora and Nick Jr and play outside with Reese
-Work more at night than during the day
-Stop obsessing over my need to have every email, fb status, and blog post read before I can
go to bed. (I know, that's completely ridiculous. But for this type A girl, I like it to be
complete. all.the.way.)
-read more books with the girls
-start preschool fun with Reese (she is hilarious with this of course)
You can pray for me in this area if you think about it. It's such an area for satan to use
guilt. But I want to be able to hear my Heavenly Father's voice when He is bringing Godly
conviction.
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